A person close me told me that they felt lonely and depressed recently. The last person in the world I would ever expect to open up and tell me about that. It broke my heart that they felt so disconnected and unsure of life and turning to someone wasn't as easy as you'd think.
I'm a huge fan when it comes to self-help and general wellbeing.. I think we just rally round and talk about these issues more! Let it be 'the norm' so more people feel like they can actually talk about it and not feel ashamed..
Here's a few pointers that help me when I'm feeling generally lonely.
Don't isolate yourself:
I'm sitting in my room as I write this after working all day and not speaking to anyone. Around two years ago I spent a lot of time in my room, tucked away, avoiding seeing anyone. I look back now and regret wasting so much of my time. This evening I'll go watch a film with my mum and make her some dinner. Sometimes just being around someone you love is enough, you don't have to talk if you don't feel like it. If you live alone, phone/facetime a friend if you don't feel like going out - or even better, go out for a drink with someone!
Keep busy:
I know you don't want too, I know you want to curl up under your duvet. I remember thinking in the summer a few years ago, it's harder to go under the blanket in the summer because it's so hot and googling dark curtains in order to keep the sunshine out of my room. This seems crazy to think of now! Walking is now my favourite thing to do! Keeping yourself entertained and busy is the best bit of advise for being lonely. You don't have to have money, you can just jump on the bus or arrange times with friends or family. The more you get in the swing of being busy, the easier it is to face. You'll be distracted and enjoying your life!
Be good to yourself:
Definitely the most important. If you learn to love yourself (I'm still working on this) you'll learn to enjoy your own company. Give yourself a break! Tell yourself how important you are and appreciate that in your circumstances, it could always be worse. Maybe when you jump on the bus, go to one of your favourite shops and buy yourself a little treat!
Self help books do work:
They're there for a reason. My sister lives by these silly, inspirational quotes and I use to shrug them off. I now realise how important and helpful they actually are. Self-help books are the same! I decided to head to my local library and get a bunch of them! (Some good books include Loneliness by June Hunt and Freedom from Loneliness by Jennifer Page) - Even if you read a page or two, here and there it's something. Addressing why your mind is so powerful and dealing with these emotions makes it easier to deal with!
Reach out to someone:
It was hard for the person mentioned early to tell me about how they are feeling, really hard. A lot of people tend to keep things bottled up in fear of feeling weak minded or even being naive to how they are actually feeling! Talking about it is addressing it.. They may even open up and tell you that they understand and have felt the same way. Reaching out to anyone, even your doctor to even talk about gets it out in the open and things instantly feel more clearer. Honestly, just taking about things can take a huge weight off your shoulders. We, as humans, deal with a lot in our daily lives as it is. Talk. You are human. It's ok too.. Just remember that you aren't alone and we all feel the same way.. Don't keep it bottled up, it'll only get worse.
I hope some of these points can help/remind you in any way possible that the more we learn to love and feel great about ourselves, the more we enjoy our one life! Let me know how you get on in the comments!
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